Films

CHARLEMAGNE! (73 min, 2012)
A horror host recruits his friend Walter on a rampage to physical and spiritual transcendence encountering naysayers, a blind woman, and a man named Mr. Baby.
WATCH THE TRAILER

Joey’s Song (Xiu Xiu music video – 2012, 4 minutes.) An ailing wisp resembling a human totters around industrial landscapes in his wheelchair as plastic cowboys and Indians duke it out and a baby cries like a baby and wets himself.

NAKED PREACHER LADY (2012. 70 minutes.)
Doc on Sacramento local self-help burlesque celebrity who billed herself as the prophet Baby Rae The Naked Preacher Lady, also the name of her public access show. With a soundtrack composed for the movie by Xiu Xiu.

FELONY FLATS (2011. 65 minutes.)
A smart man raised as a degenerate idiot by a mother’s wildly teetering sanity was abused by the system and the adults who were supposed to care for him and now we see him going about his daily business and doing his thing. Music by Hemostat.
Watch the trailer.

I AM UGLY AND I WANT TO DIE SO WHY DON’T YOU JUST PLEASE FUCK ME (2010, 70 minutes) A self loathing THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT style doc made by Bob Moricz about Bob Moricz. A haggard love letter to you from him scribbled in smudged purple ink.
Video press release. Buy DVD.

OVERDOSE IN THE HOSPITAL OF LOVE (2010, 50 minutes)
Cinema free jazz riff on the U.S. health care system in the guise of a hospital drama soap opera progressively deteriorating and visibly ravaged by disease.
Video press kit. Watch Episode 1. Watch Episode 2. Watch Episode 3. Watch Episode 4. Watch Episode 5. Buy DVD. Buy soundtrack.

BUMPS (2009, 70 minutes)
Based on the events of the Gloucester Massachusetts high school pregnancy pact where teen girls reconfigure the concept of what it means to raise a family.
Watch the trailer. Buy the DVD. Watch a clip. Video press release. Watch another clip.

It Came And Went And It Was Nothing (2009, 10 minutes)
Super 8mm somnambulistic night fever about what happens to lost souls trapped within psychic circles incapable of snapping into segments of independent thought.
Watch it. Buy DVD.

The Terrible Toothache (2007, 15 minutes) Shot in Sacramento, a weird and horrific place where some of the worst serial killer crimes in history were committed. A sarcastic riff on phony cop dramas employing as many cliches as possible for discombobulated comic effect. The awful awful heat glistens on every actor’s pore. Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

illustration by Irina Beffa

The Slaves Of Destructo (2007, 8 minutes)
“I was called upon to put together an improvised play at Brainstains, a local Arts Co-Op at the time, and at the last minute decided upon embarking on an improvised cinematic experiments with the drunken party attendees, a sack full of grotesque props, my battered wits and my tiny Sony Handicam.”
Buy DVD.

The Slaves Of Destructo from Bobbywood Motion Pictures on Vimeo.

The Big Fat Period (2007, 14 minutes)
“Personal demon vibe flows powerfully within the confines of the small room in which we shot this tense drama about the three last women on earth and their fake baby. One of my favorite shooting experiences due to a true and heavy psychic connection between all involved.”
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

A Night In The Life Of Doris Dolores (2007. 15 minutes)
“I’d been obsessed with a book of Japanese death poems by zen monks and wanted to create some sort of cinematic equivalent to the simplicity, humor, and confounding totality found within those poems, choosing to use as a vehicle a disconnected ventriloquist and his out of control party girlfriend. Shot on Super 8mm Ektachrome film.”
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

PALACE OF STAINS (2007, 65 minutes)
Shot in one day histrionic “hellanovella” about three warring clans from a diverse array of socio-economic backgrounds battling out their familial frustrations in dumb and destructive ways. A cautionary tale about the perils of not looking within.
Watch trailer.
Buy DVD.

Spree! All The Way To Mexico (2006, 15 minutes)
Steadman and DeVee are a criminal couple on the run from the police in a deathwish dervish of crime and mayhem. Shot on Super 8mm film in Sacramento, California, the nexus of evil.
Watch trailer.
Buy DVD.

Nothing Is Good (2006, 7 minutes)
The first BM A/V psycho shock.
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Bog People official Xiu Xiu music video (2005, 3 minutes)
Watch it. Buy DVD.

Midnight of My Life (2004, 64 minutes)
A young woman named Emma, having suffered an abusive childhood in the California town of Tolland, returns to the dreaded city to face the demons of her past. She encounters monsters, aliens, a political assassin, zombies, slashers, a witch, and her long lost brother the mad scientist.
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Love’s Lazer (2002, 20 minutes)
Well-to-do Edgar and Elvira are new parents in a floundering relationship, so they go to experimental surgeon Dr. Rohmer for lazer brain surgery to make them a more compatible pair. The only side effects are increased sexual appetite and a propensity for violence. Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Slut Shack (2001, 6 minutes)
A psycho shock nightmare about captivity, revolt, sexuality, and the post-armageddon lifestyle. Shot on Super 8mm film.
Watch it. Buy DVD.

Empressed (2001, 11 minutes)
Many millions of years in the future, the ruler of a decimated earth holds court and is ultimately attacked and conquered by a rival foe. Shot on glorious blown out Super 8mm film.
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

A Big Ass Lust For Speed (2001, 37 minutes)
Mimmy Fissman chucks his entire sham of an existence and hits the road in search of something, but he doesn’t know what. Along the way he encounters a young woman named Utah and Dr. Diabolos, a mad serial killer. Mike Kuchar appears as The Man Blessed With A Curse.
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Hot Black Milk (2001, 25 minutes)
Artist and Reflections From A Cinematic Cesspool editor Mary Pacios stars as Maria Dellanumbra, a former Hollywood starlet contending with the ghosts of her past. Joshua Allen shows up as her emotionally wrecked bastard soon and Mike Kuchar co-stars as Rick Fast, a former flame.
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Bloody Maw of the Man Wolf (2000, 25 minutes)
Kurt Stumbaugh plays Roderick Sanford, a man who thinks he’s responsible for a string of full moon murders in the neghborhood. He turns to booze, withdraws from his wife, and sobs uncontrallably thinking he’s a werewolf. Not even his shrink can help him.

Bloody Maw Of The Man Wolf from Bobbywood Motion Pictures on Vimeo.

Buy DVD.

Medicus Rex (2000, 13 minutes)
“Joshua Allen was back in town and we hashed out this tale of torn asunder twins, slapping dialogue together in tandem through email and shooting it one evening in the Oakland apartment I shared with Irina and our roommate Bonnie. A notable use of very early super lo fi CGI (loCGI?) thanks to Mr. Kurt Stumbaugh.”
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Rich Little Richard III Versus the Crack Whore Marine Corps (2000, 25 minutes)
“I’ve been a big Shakespeare nerd since high school and Dick 3 has always been one of my favorite characters. At the time I saw many similarities between us. Of course it’s a psychologically pornographic blast of brain flatulence mixed with my own private mythologies and the Bard’s verbal yummies.”
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Kash House Meat Cleavage (2000, 25 minutes)
“Got my first rave reviews for this in Maximum Rock N Roll who surely seemed to appreciate the punk rock methods which I used to make this movie. Shot it in one day on 9/9/99 at my parents’ old house in Redwood City while they were away. I don’t think my mom would have liked what we did in her bedroom.”
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

Brainbox (1999, 20 minutes)
“Joshua Allen and I wrote and directed this thing about two mad scientists battling over ultimate brain power. It was a lot of fun shooting with George Kuchar in Studio 8 at the San Francisco Art Institute. The class was making Phantom of the Pine Barrens at the time and we just used the same set, like Roger Corman.”
Watch trailer. Buy DVD.

I Love You Don Lobo, Fuck You Don Lobo (1998, 15 minutes)
“My love affair with the domestic drama started here. At this point I’d been hanging out with George Kuchar and witnessing his cinematic techniques and tactics and I was high on making movies with a new found freedom. Wrote the script in a motel the day before shooting. Watch trailer. BuyDVD.

Shoe (1998, 6 minutes)
Two guys who lose a shoe and are forced to perform a strange act at the behest of a strange man to atone for their transgressions.
BuyDVD.

Shoe from Bobbywood Motion Pictures on Vimeo.

Rod Rhyebold Must Be Destroyed (1994, 70 minutes)
Beach Boys Phantom of the Opera mash-up starring Xiu Xiu’s Jamie Stewart as a disfigured former rock star on the road to avenge his waylaid fate at the hands of an unscrupulous recording mogul played by Kurt Stumbaugh.
Watch trailer. BuyDVD.

Gutwrenched (1991, 65 minutes) Buy DVD.
“The kiss off to the psycho-slasher movies which influenced and inspired me as a child. I was a senior in high school and decided to make my final slasher movie rip off starring my closest friends. Gutwrenched is the result.” Buy DVD.

(as actor)

Supernatural (2011. Roy Sorenson.)
“It was easy for me to channel the homeless substitute teacher who may or may not have murdered one of his elementary school students. My years in the public high school sector prepared me for this.” Written and directed by Jeff Guay.

Coven Of The Heathenites (2009. himself.)
Another cool George Kuchar video diary. Watch it.

Principia (2009. Sr. Roboto.)
“There is something all right with the world when you get to have a character with this name on your list of credits. Another fine piece from Jeff Guay about apocalypse, redemption, birth, death, and madness.”

Te En Video (2009. Himself.)
This is a Spanish documentary about underground filmmakers made by Victor Olid. Other filmmakers featured are Jesus Franco, J.R. Bookwalter, Damon Packard, George Kuchar, Naxo Fiol, Carlos Atanes, Andy Rodriguez, Diego Lopez, and Dani Moreno. Watch trailer.

Don’t Worry It’s A New Millenium (2009. Naked Man Running With Playstation.)
“Probably my most challenging and liberating role. There is something sort of transcendent about running naked down a strip of densely populated urban landscape. Some guys asked me for directions. Jeff Guay wrote and directed this surreal piece of absurdia. He’s a good friend, so I was glad to do it.”

All I Ever Think About Is Death (2008. Dentist.)
There is something all right with the world when you have a movie with a title like this on your list of credits. I also love playing dentists and doctors. I feel a strong connection to this one because it very accurately captures a feeling I’ve felt a more than a few thousand times. Watch it.

Camera Tricks: This is George Kuchar (2008. Himself.)
Ronaldo Barbachano was shooting a short documentary about the George Kuchar class experience on the day I was there for Queen Conga, so you can see me applying Linda Martinez’s makeup. I think his camera was broken so he had to use some sort of extreme wide screen lens. Watch it.

Happy Birthday Bob: Behind the Stains (2006. Himself.)
“Damian Sol and Sarah Felts put together this half hour documentary about the making of my shot in a day on my birthday histrionic hellanovela PALACE OF STAINS. I am so glad they shot this thing because the stress of shooting a feature in one day was pretty intense and I had no time to stop and smell the roses.”

Queen Conga (2006. Orgiast.)
“I met my good friend and star of many a BM A/V Ian Sundahl on the set of this George Kuchar class production. It is also always a pure joy working with the inimitable Linda Martinez. You can read about what lead up to her telling me I have a nice package here. You can see a clip here.

Cinema Insomnia Presents Santo Vs. The Vampire Women (2005. Dr. Loco.)
This was so much fun! As a big fan of Mr. Lobo, it was a true pleasure appearing as his luchador masked horror host nemesis Dr. Loco. Also, a scantily clad nurse massaged my shoulders for most of my segment. You can see the full episode here.

Interview (2003. Job Interviewer.)
I did not do a very good job memorizing a high volume of dialogue which paved the way for a fairly amusing special feature on the DVD release of this Woodland Independent Films production. A really great, surreal piece of writing and film making. Watch it.

Phantom of the Pine Barrens (1998. Student Protester.)
George Kuchar invited me to studio 8 at the San Francisco Art Institute to participate in the making of this class film. It was a huge thrill for me to witness firsthand the goings on during the production of a GK psychotronic teleplay. What a very happy day. You can see a clip here.

Bear With Me (1999. Prosecuting Attorney.)
“I play a sleazy lawyer with a pencil mustache in this one. Had to wear it for a month or so and looked really gross. Had a job interview which I totally didn’t get because of the aforementioned facial hair.”

From here down, all movies are written and directed by San Francisco filmmaker Maxwell Abbacowe.

Underdeveloped (1999. Love.)
“An allegorical group therapy session where I play Love.”

The General Quality Of Life On The Planet Earth Should Improve Within The Next Few Moments (1999. Mr. Rain-And-Floodwater.)

Grandmother Wolf (1996. Wolf.)
“I got to wear wolf makeup and grandma drag in this fine Maxwell Abbacowe short. Performing archetypal roles are always nice. You get to try on a new suit made from human memory.”

Dream Analysis Man (1993. Mountain Dog.)
“I played a Cain type character. I remember doing a ridiculous job hamming up a scene where I kill my brother. Lots of shameless mugging and physical contortion which the director wisely kept out of the frame.”